It is popular knowledge that as human beings we have 5 senses some have gone to say we have 6. That is the sense of smell, taste, sight, feel, hearing and the sense of humour. I believe that as humans we have a SEVENTH SENSE… This is the sense of self or in other words self-awareness, this is something that many of us coming from black African homes struggle with even in our own societies.
Self-awareness is a vital part of living a better life and towards attaining the desires of your heart. Successful people have a great self-awareness that propels them in the most difficult of challenges. Often we ask ourselves why is it always me that is always at the bottom of the pile, why am I always left out, why do they look down upon me, why can’t I achieve the goals I set for myself. Self-awareness is that consciousness of who you are and fully knowing your abilities and qualities. It might seem to be an easy task to have a sense of self but the biggest challenge we face in being aware of oneself is our ears, what they take in daily affects us greatly. Many of us desire a lot of validation from our peers, this is known as external validation and to counter negativity from other people you have to firstly internally validate. Internal Validation starts not with you but with others, validate those around you first, recognise the good things done for you and around you. When we start to recognise the goodness in those around us it becomes easier for us to see the good qualities within ourselves. Discover the goodness within yourself before waiting for other people to notice the goodness in you.
Internal validation is based on three legs Values, Morals and Ethics……
Values in simple terms are self-set rules, these are things I tell myself that I should never find myself doing. What is it that you say you should never be found saying. I have a value that I hold so dearly that I will never judge a person by how they look or based on any label placed upon them but only to judge people based on their character. This is something I have learnt from American civil rights activist Martin Luther King Junior.
Morals on the other hand are rules not set by ourselves for ourselves but by society for us to follow. If you were to visit me during the holidays at around 3pm you would most likely find me in my pyjamas YES I am a loafer during the holidays. I don’t care who you are, except my mom of course, I will address you in my sleeping attire as long as it is in the four corners of my house. Society however dictates that I can’t stroll late into a Monday Lecture in my pyjamas. It is socially unacceptable for someone to walk in public naked (even nudists). It is an abomination to do such but no matter the desire to do so it is important that we follow the rules of society.
I view ethics as the professional standards that you have to live by. These are the standards you must live up to by virtue of who you are in society. As a university student it is expected of me to never cheat in an exam and to always hand in work that is my own. Never comprise on these standards, compromise leads to sub-standard and sub-standard and nobody wants poor quality. It might work once or twice but you will never accomplish anything meaningful with sub-standard quality. Imagine if Mercedes Benz was to produce and sell the E-Class range of cars without enough levels of Auto Transmission Fluid because a supplier could not deliver……..but Mercedes will never do that because it is unethical for them to mislead their clients into thinking they have bought a quality product.
Whenever you set to discover the awesome qualities within you, the potential you hold within you must be founded on your Values, Morals and Ethics.
But and a big BUT WHY must you even have a sense of self? The answer to that question is the PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS. A happy you is three times more creative and three times more creative means three more times you are likely to be successful and achieve the desires of your heart. Happiness is something we all crave for no one in their right mind wants to be sad. However happiness only fulfils the “Why” part.
What is the “What” you need to do to achieve a sense of self, it comes in the form of a Power Statement. A Power Statement is something that you tell yourself every day, when you wake up, during the day and even before you sleep. One of the best moments for an effective power statement is in the morning just before you take a shower when your brain is fresh and well rested. If you are like me and don’t take showers in the morning you can always do it in bed lol. A Power Statement is vital to you maintaining a sense of self.
How then do you come up with a Power Statement and how do you make sure it sticks. First thing is first get yourself a pen and a clear plain white paper. On that paper write down 8 adjectives that best describe the good qualities that you have and when you are done select the top 6. Now when you write down these adjectives put down next to each one a piece of evidence that, that quality exists. From the top 6 adjectives you choose then make a dynamic sentence with those 6 adjectives.
Below is an example of how to come up with a Power Statement. On your left below are the first 8 adjectives and in the red are the top 6.
- Intelligent
- Sociable
- Dependable
- Tenacious
- Pro-active
- Teammate
- Organized
- Understanding
- Intelligent
- Sociable
- Tenacious
- Pro-active
- Teammate
- Organized
If you are a sales manager your Power Statement would look something like below
As an intelligent and organized sales manager, my tenacious and pro-active approach resulted in numerous important contract wins. My excellent sociable (networking) skills together with my teammates have provided our team with vital client leads, and my ability to develop client relationships has resulted in a 10% increase in new accounts being opened.
Write down the Power Statement and put it where you can see till you memorise it and say it to yourself at least once a day. Repetition makes it stick keep saying till it becomes part and parcel of your way of thinking and living
The pursuit of happiness is a long and never ending journey which can be tough for many of us but by having the SEVENTH SENSE happiness will be within reach. Ignore the not so important external validation and begin to internally validate yourself. Only you and not the world can determine who you are. Values, Morals and Ethics are the basis of internal validation and reaching a sense of self. An apple a day keeps the doctor away and a Power Statement a day keeps sadness away!!!!
Takunda Gumbu
Takunda is the owner of this blog……….. click on his name above to know about him.
Takunda Tinashe Gumbu 